It was an... interesting day. I saw a "straightforward" movie that left me completely confused, and went to a very unusual and compositionally twisted concert that gave me new focus and clarity. Fo real, yo.
So since today was the second day of "Spring Break" (hopefully the quotations will communicate how I feel about the length of this particular "break") I decided it was high time I got to a movie - and I walked over to the matinee of "He's Just Not That Into You". I had read the book and seen the reviews, and I had gotten reports from people who'd seen the movie, so I thought I knew pretty much what to expect... and yes, on first reflection, it's a surprisingly good movie. It seems to be, as the kids would say, "legit" - essentially a series of examples showing how someone is not into someone else, and the someone else should pack it in and move on since there are far more "rules" than "exceptions" when it comes to relationships (no matter which stories of miraculous happily-ever-afters you've heard). Pretty up front, right? Then I really started thinking about it, and I realized how many mixed messages the movie had been sending. For example:
1. As stated, you are the rule, not the exception. Stop listening to and believing all the stories.
2. Men do not change, and they all act pretty much the same way.
3. People lie to themselves and each other about the signals they're getting and sending all the time.
4. You should listen to us, since this movie is based on a book that was obviously written by experts.
5. When it comes to relationships, people will change if they want to.
6. You just might be the exception.
7. If you are a Hollywood movie star, you will actually be the exception (several exceptions if the movie is an ensemble piece).
8. We are experts, but this is a movie, so anything we say doesn't really apply.
9. Please buy into the stories, so you will keep buying movie tickets.
And so on. It was fairly frustrating to contemplate on the walk home... Here's my thought: relationship books and movies are not places to turn to when looking for dating advice. (Remember the "Rules" book from a while back?) The best thing to do is figure out how to be happy with who you are, and share that happiness with people you meet. If you want advice about the opposite sex, try asking a member of that sex - if they'll give you honest-to-goodness answers, it means they care about you (one way or another). Nothing applies to everybody, and in the end, all you can really do is be observant, go with your gut, and err on the side of kindness. And stop giving people advice. (Still working on that one!) There were a few points I liked and agreed with from the movie, but overriding that was the fact that it annoyed me by pandering to the "happily-ever-after" crowd. Why did everything have to be tied up so neatly? Life really is messy, and frustrating, and annoying, with good stuff mixed in. At least, in my experience...
And then tonight I attended a concert (after I stopped in at a wedding reception, which was lovely - congrats, Chels and Dave!) entitled "Water Passion" - it was a passion piece, sort of like the Messiah. This one could have been subtitled "Chinese Buddhist Easter Cantata for Choir and Soloists, With Nearly No Instrumentation but Heavy Percussion Consisting Mainly of Bowls of Water, Incorporating Eastern Chord Structures and Sounds but Based on Bach" - okay, maybe that's a bit much for a subtitle, but it pretty much covers the premise of the concert. It was amazing. (I typed "amazong", which is kind of funny, considering.)((Or maybe it's just me, and really late.)) Anyway, it was a fascinating piece of work, with the water used for baptism, rebirth, tears, change, and sound effects. The percussionists were doing some astonishing things with strange instruments and the bowls of water... I don't think I could do them justice if I tried to describe them. I was riveted to the performance, as was most of the crowd... If you have a chance to hear this work at some point in the future, TAKE IT.
I'd like to say something funny and pithy and self-deprecating here, but I'm really really tired, so it'll have to wait until later. Hopefully coming soon - PROM updates! Oh, and Ballyhoo.
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