Friday Bonus (Two Weeks)

CLASSIC. The drama, the soapiness, the amazingly terrible hair and clothes... hello, '80's, what were we thinking?!? Can't get past the complete catchiness of the song, though - I'll always look back fondly on the summer that this song was our (unofficial) theme for Girls' Camp. True story.

Enjoy! (Oh, and I didn't realize this until the second - or third - time I watched it, but the GUY is the one wearing the brooch.)

(ETA:  Go you YouTube and check out "Last Christmas" ORIGINAL or WHAM or GEORGE MICHAEL.  Good times.)

And, FYI, if you've got some time to kill you can go browse around for covers of this tune - some of the videos are bizarre! And hilarious! And in some ways, even more '80's-tastic! (I KNOW - who would have thought that could even be POSSIBLE?)

Don't you just want to go put on leggings and feather your hair? I know I do. Merry Christmas!

I Totally Forgot...

... to blog about my first and only experience buying cigarettes. (Monday.) CREEPY. I was going to also include the story of my first and only experience buying beer.

Remind me to get on that, OK? I've got to go finish judging entries for the elementary school Reflections contest now.

Thanks.

Mankind Is My Business

In which we shall see: Absolutely no blood. Just kazoos and *drool*.

* * * * * * * * *

So, last weekend I had this blind date. The cold sore dropped far enough that my eye was no longer bloodshot and swollen shut, and careful makeup pretty much hid the rest. Already, my night was in the black. In reality, this "date" was actually an opportunity to get two of my friends to meet, but when I got tagged as a third wheel I insisted on even numbers just so I wouldn't feel so... odd. (Sorry.) I figured it would be a chance for me to practice, you know, talking to a boy, and that we'd probably spend most of the time gabbing as a group anyway. Not so much...

Gotta say, my non-date date was an AWESOME date. My two newly-met friends started talking, and MNDD immediately engaged me in conversation, neatly pairing everybody off. He was so easy to talk to, and interested and attentive, and I didn't feel anywhere near as stupid as I usually do trying to have a conversation with a guy. He's way too young for me, of course, but he was cheerful and funny and gentlemanly and cute and his story about getting arrested in Chicago and spending the night in jail is an absolute mind-blower! (So not kidding. It was AMAZING.) Later, one of my two friends told me she was sure we'd dated before, we looked so... cozy. That? Right there? Is a good date...

...in spite of Jason. Or, I suppose, Jason was the exception-spice that made the evening that much more tasty... (All right, ignore the metaphors. Go ahead.) We saw a play, then walked half a block to IHoP for hot chocolate. We were seated, asked for waters and hot chocolates, and before our server had left the table we found out his name was Jason, he'd just broken up with his fiancee, and he was willing to sing pretty much any Christmas carol we wanted - as long as it was sad and depressing. We got him started on "Blue Christmas" before he headed off to place our order, and we had our very own Elvis the rest of the evening. Nothing says "Happy Holidays" (or, "Your life isn't as bad as you think") like a depressed, bitter, singing pancake-house waiter! (How do we get that on a Christmas card?)

* * * * *

I'm still trying to find an MP3 or YouTube video to share, but in the meantime, listen for a version of "Mele Kalikimaka" with a female vocalist and a whole chorus of kazoos. It is EPIC. It's edging up my list of favorite Christmas songs, and may end somewhere next to this one:


* * * * *

Fellow Gleeks: Take a moment with me here to revisit one of the most beautiful things about a really great episode (today's) -

Have you ever seen anybody RUN like that before? *melts into a puddle of goo* Someday, I'll have a picture of that moment. And a YouTube clip to watch over and over. And computer wallpaper that plays those five seconds on a continuous loop. Merry Christmas, indeed.


(And until I get that picture/video clip/wallpaper, enjoy this placeholder from the pilot. Thank YOU, Matthew Morrison!)

Today, I Broke a Nail

Today, I woke up with my eye glued shut thanks to pus from a sty or pinkeye or something. I washed it out with the only eye drops in the house, which turned out to be allergy eye drops, and they dilated the one pupil until I could barely see.

Today, I came in to work wearing an eye patch.

Today, I nicked my wrist on a broken glass as I was unpacking a bin, and bled copiously all over the floor. Fortunately, I was wearing a sweatshirt and that soaked up a lot of the blood running down my arm. Also fortunately, I had a pile of dusty tissue paper handy (from the non-broken glasses) that I could use to try to staunch the flow (which was fortunately flowing strongly enough that I don't think I'll get an infection from the dust and dirt. Score!). Not so fortunately, I couldn't find anyone else in the building to help me. I wasn't dizzy or freaking out or anything - but when you're pressing a handful of old, blood-soaked tissue paper to a wound you can't actually see because it's on the other side of your arm and you just HOPE you're applying pressure to the right spot, you kind of want someone around for a little moral support, you know? The costume shop was completely empty, and everyone in the front office was on the phone and so couldn't come to my aid EVEN AS I WAS WAVING MY BLOODY ARM AROUND IN THE LOBBY. (That was descriptive, not British swearing.) Eventually, I got it all taken care of myself (although I had to go back to the - empty - costume shop for band-aids) and even got my sweatshirt into a load of laundry. (As soon as I started the machine, one of the costumers walked in. Oy.)

Today, I really needed cookies.

Today I burned myself with hot glue. I pulled the droplet off my hand, and it took the skin with it.

Today, I spent much of my time in the bathroom scraping mucus out of my eye and carefully dabbing Neosporin over the swelling (even though you should apparently NEVER use Neosporin that close to your eyes). Then I found out that there's a good chance the sty/pinkeye/whatever is actually a cold sore (ON MY EYE) and that thanks to the herpes virus I've had all my life, I will probably someday need cornea transplants if I don't get the shot that can (FINALLY) kill the virus. Also, Neosporin doesn't do squat for viruses. Also, if I ever need the cornea transplant I will have to pay for it myself because no insurance is going to cover it, seeing as I have had the herpes virus all my life. Plus I have a cold sore ON MY EYE and a blind date in two days. (Insert applicable joke here. Make sure it's bitter.)

Today I had leftover pasta from the Cheesecake Factory for lunch, and I did not get sick or food poisoning or anything. Who would have thought?

No News Makes for Boring Headlines - Sorry

No news is usually because there's way too much going on to actually have time to talk about it, even though it's not particularly newsworthy. Maybe I should take classes on tabloid journalism, so that I'd always have something to write about here. Anyway, in this case, no news is because:

- Changeover week at the theatre. Old show out, new show in - usual schedule: 10 days. This changeover: 4 days (because my boss refuses to work Thanksgiving). We did a great job with prep beforehand though (IMHYAO), so no-one's tried to staple anyone else to the hydraulic lift. Yet.

- Thanksgiving! Yay! (except see above). We're borrowing a tradition from my friend Sara's family and doing "pie all day" - after Sunday's Music and the Spoken Word, though, I suggested we do a "Pay It Forward Pie Day" (because I am extraordinarily dorky and I also really liked the broadcast). Every time you have a piece of pie on Thursday (and you can have one whenever you'd like) you either: 1) write down something nice you'll do for someone else that day and put it in a jar, or 2) go find something nice to do for someone else and then write it down and put it in the jar. Apple pie for breakfast - Mom and I are ready to go.

- My sister and her family are coming for the holiday - they'll be staying in the basement with me, which means that most of the last few days have been spent digging through the mountain of storage boxes that filled the Big Room (this is it's actual name) and sorting and re-packing fewer boxes to go in the storage room (also it's actual name; not to be confused with the Food Storage Room - apparently, we're a very literal group). It's... kind of amazing, really - furniture arranged, kitchen area cleaned, carpet vacuumed... it even looks like someplace I'd want to live. (If it wasn't in my parents basement, that is.) I'm excited to see the kids (for the .03 minutes I'll have to spare thanks to Item #1) and my sis and Mom and I are dragging Dad and the b-i-l to New Moon Friday morning. (Truth be told, the guys are not all that reluctant. HA.) Most people are a little surprised and even alarmed that I haven't seen the movie yet - it opened THURSDAY AT MIDNIGHT, after all.

- The plan was to have all my family Christmas presents ready by Thanksgiving, since I've got my sister's family. That... didn't QUITE work, but hopefully the things I'll take care of later will be light and mail-able.

- I'm judging the Reflections Contest entries for the local elementary (my old school! I still totally know the song!) in Film/Video, and Music. I remember writing a song for a Reflections contest, and singing it into a TAPE RECORDER, and moving on the next round and singing it for actual people, and thinking I was pretty cool. Who knows, maybe I was.

Wow, I feel old.

- And.... Still determined to give up fiction come January (decided to use December to re-read favorites and get caught up on books I'd had "back ordered"; the family wants to start another weight-loss contest, which is great, except that the prize has been suggested as a family vacation and some are leaning towards a year-long competition with a vacay in January 2011 so that people have time to save up... and I fully expect to be in England, so - no good. I definitely need to lose the weight, though. I started eating chocolate again after a few weeks away, and it MESSED with my digestive system - evidently, I should only be eating very expensive chocolate, which does not make my tummy nearly as unhappy. I broke tonight (after vacuuming a few miles of carpet in the Big Room) and had ice cream for the first time in over a month, but only because it was Schwann's Chocolate Chip, purchased at my instigation and in honor of the holiday. These days, an ice cream sighting like that in our freezer is as rare as spotting a single, upwardly mobile, aesthetically pleasing man over the age of 30 in the Salt Lake valley - and twice as satisfying. (Zing!) After Thanksgiving and Changeover are over I'm getting things back in order and getting back into my jeans. And finding another/additional job. And getting back to work on my book project. And sorting out my filing cabinet. And getting into grad school, with grants and scholarships to pay for it.

I've got to get up for work in about 5 hours, so I'm off - tomorrow I'll finish Marley's chains and politely turn down a print bid and probably paint stuff and OD on Glee songs, since those are pretty much all I've got on my Ipod right now.

* * * * *

I ganked this quote from a friend's blog - I'm working on both. (I'm not saying this post is in any way indicative of either, but I'm trying!)

Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.

— Benjamin Franklin

Bonus Content #10 - Character Values Trump Sexiness

Wow. Somebody in the mainstream media is finally getting it right. This article is targeted as advice to women about what to look for in men, and it's good stuff for both sexes to consider working on (urgh, just cannot find a way to end that sentence without a dangling preposition!).

In conclusion, when I build a house it's going to have to include both a den and a laboratory.

Bonus Content # 9 - Sesame Street In Da House

I'm not really one for gansta rap, but...



Happy 40th Birthday to Sesame Street!

Rated "C" for Chastity

In which we shall see: NOTHING AT ALL IF YOU ARE NOT OLD ENOUGH TO TALK ABOUT CHASTITY, CHLAMYDIA, PAPER DOLLS, WHITE ELEPHANTS, DECADENT DESSERTS, JAKE GYLLENHALL, AND LOTS OF THINGS ABOUT WHICH VERY DIRTY JOKES COULD BE MADE (ALTHOUGH THEY WEREN'T, 'CAUSE WE DON'T ROLL LIKE THAT - JUST SLIGHTLY SMUDGED), OR ANYTHING YOU MIGHT HAVE TO ASK A PARENT TO DESCRIBE/DEFINE. (Seriously, that can be embarrassing for some parents. Good for them to deal with, but awkward.) ALSO, THE FUNNY. IN GENERAL, THERE WILL BE TOO MUCH INFORMATION. JUST SO YOU KNOW.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

(Are you old enough to read this? STOP NOW IF YOU'RE NOT.)

(Are you SURE?)

(OK, then.)

Last weekend, I attended the first annual (Bi-annual, if we get really lucky) Chastity Celebration, "White Knuckles and Chocolate." It was EPIC. It all started with some pithy and insightful commentary posted to a friend's blog. It is SO TRUE. And because it is so true, Tara and Mr. B decided to get some action, er, take action and create a truly motivational reward for those of us that have, indeed, been chanting "Chastity is my favorite" for more years than any of us really want to count.

The set-up was very specific - attendees were asked to 1) be living a chaste life (the policy, naturally, was "Don't ask, don't tell - LET IT BE UPON YOUR OWN CONSCIENCE"), 2) bring a delicious and/or decadent dessert, chocolate encouraged (there was even a reminder notice sent out that strongly discouraged anyone from "cheating" by bringing, say, snack-size candy bars or even shopping at all for the party at Wal-mart), 3) bring a "chastity token", some reminder or representation of this great law under which we labor that would be used for a "white elephant"-style exchange, and 4) be prepared to creatively express feelings about chastity in both a Chastity Belt Design contest (paper dolls, markers, crayons, etc... were provided) and a Reflections-style contest to which poetry, essays, artwork, etc... could be submitted. (Married people were not invited - not because they aren't chaste, but because they are having sex. Consideration has been given to someday holding a "Fidelity" party, but that may depend upon the rate of engagements that result from the Chastity Celebrations.)

The desserts were staggering. Literally. From Oreo Truffles (*drool*) to chocolate-dipped strawberries, cookies and fudge cake and coconut surprise* (oh, my!), there were enough calories on that table to beef up a very small third-world country. I contributed Dump Cake** (cherry), on the rationale that sometimes, in order to preserve chastity, one has to "dump" whomever one is dating. Or so I've heard. Anyway, the dessert was luscious and actually refreshingly non-chocolate.

Dress code note: there wasn't one (a dress code) since we were all about the chastity and really didn't need to set one up. In the spirit (?) of things, however, I wore a long jacket that I have in my costumes that has an odd, hippie-esque pattern. My reasoning was that the pattern was vaguely viral, and therefore resembled VD (not that I would know. It was a GUESS). In wearing the jacket to a Chastity Party, I was saying, "Thanks to chastity, this is the closest I'll ever get to VD!" (*rimshot*) It seemed funnier in person. Also, I wore my glasses all night as a tribute to Marilyn Monroe in How to Marry a Millionaire: "Men aren't attentive to girls who wear glasses." Maybe I've been wearing INVISIBLE glasses all these years - felt, but not seen.

The token exchange was next - we almost (ALMOST) burned off all the calories we'd consumed, we were laughing so hard. Highlights included: a metal frame with the letters H-O-P-E across the top, featuring a picture of Jake Gyllenhall - it would have been a hot-potato gift except that the girl who opened it had to leave early and took off before anyone (me) had a chance to steal. (I might be getting one for Christmas. Fingers crossed.) An egg timer. A nutcracker. An (ironically) un-opened Sheri Dew (?) cassette tape of a talk on chastity. A stuffed chlamydia microbe!!!!. (Genius! "I went to a chastity party and I got Chlamydia!") Pants. ("If you're wearing pants, you're not having sex!" "Ahhhhh.") Several dollar-store dolls, fitted out with chastity belts. Gigantic lavender granny panties.

A commemorative Finding Nemo tin.

Us: ???

Her: You've got to be careful to protect your little swimmers!

Us: *collective aneurysms from gasping in all the air in the room, and then exploding in astonished laughter*

Skipping ahead - the Chastity Belt dolls were fabulous, with Poison Ivy (ouch!) taking the win and my own "Roseanne Arnold in Disguise" coming in second. As promised, there were commemorative wooden crafts - my "trophy" was a tole-painted bear with a card reading "Bear Hugs - but only while standing up." The Reflections entries were also fascinating - several semi-poetical pieces talked about the virtue or the difficulty of living a chaste life, and one very direct work was a drawing on someone's Iphone of a girl with hairy legs. (See: Return to Me.) The winning item was simple and expressive - a picture of some minor celebrity lounging poolside with the caption: "Chastity is... a bitch." Too, too true.

Pictures, and then we hold out for another year!

I got chlamydia, and then gave it to someome else. *sigh*

My Reflections entry... hey, at least the syllables are right!

"Congratulations! You did it! (By not doing it.)"

Nick tries out his Chastity Token.

Read Tara's account here.

*The surprise is that there's no coconut.

** Easiest recipe EVER.

* * * * *

In a related note, I have drama herpes - or, as it's also called, "glitter". I am absolutely covered with the stuff - at work today I started making a couple of head wreaths and the leaves and flowers were coated with glitz to start with. Tomorrow I finish putting them together and THEN add even more crystals - I'll be picking glitter out of my hair and teeth for Valentine's Day. (It's good to already have plans, I suppose.)

* * * * *

In non-chastity related news, I watched "Tyler Perry's Madea Goes to Jail; The Play" with some girls last night - and holy cow, Miss Ella wasn't the only one having impure thoughts about a cross. CRIKEY.

Halloween Hoopla

Day 5 of Halloween Week: Skipped it. Really. Just blew right on by. Maybe had a few Halloween-colored M&M's.

Day 6: Ate candy. Worked on my costume - I'm ALL about the last-minute stuff. (Sigh.) Intended to watch Coraline (in 3-D!) but instead got my parents to watch The Addams Family (as they had never seen the movie) while I kept working. Listened to Plan-B Theater Company's Radio Hour: Alice as it was broadcast over the radio. Cooool. (Very appropriate, too, as I was working on an Alice in Wonderland costume.) It's getting quickly to the point where I'm going to be bragging about knowing Matt Bennett, the playwright (we were at school together at SUU). Loved his Radio Hour: Frankenstein last year.

Day 7 "Halloween": Slept in a little bit. Thank goodness my brother and his wife decided to do their early-Saturday-morning move next week! Got up, kept working on the costume. (Double sigh.) Finally got into makeup and hair in the early afternoon, costumed, and ran some errands - just because it was Halloween and you're allowed, nay, EXPECTED to go out in public in costume on that particular day. Nobody really “got” the outfit (I heard one "cute costume"), but I should have realized that "Black-and-White Alice in Wonderland" or "Original Alice, i.e., from the pen-and-ink drawings from the book" wouldn't exactly be a no-brainer, especially since I had no "Eat Me" or "Drink Me" props. Live and learn. Did a "dine-and-dash" at a dinner party, then went with my friend Ricky to Odyssey Dance Company's Thriller. Third year in a row - LOVE IT! A girl a couple of rows in front of me was dressed as "in-color Alice" so I got a picture. Went home, took off my very pretty wig, and started contemplating ways to re-use the costume next year.



* * * * *

After going for about a month with no ice cream, I am now moving on to cutting out cheese and chocolate (with a few specific exceptions, IF I make my exercise goals). By Thanksgiving, I’m planning to drop sugar altogether.

Also, I may have to start a book blog, because coming up soon I’ll be starting that Year Without Fiction (i.e., Novels). It’s time – I really need to take my brain back.

It's Raining

100 Life Goals (Part 3)

Continuing on the theme of "in no particular order"...

60 - Complete the new Value Virtue
59 - Complete the YW Personal Progress (again)
58 - Teach an Institute class
57 - Go to the Library of Congress (y'know, hang out)
56 - Get a second Masters' degree (see #99)
55 - Learn to cook French food
54 - Learn Origami
53 - Set someone free
52 - Actually rely on prayer
51 - Ride the world's tallest rollercoaster
50 - Send something personal to the moon
49 - Direct a production of a Shakespeare play
48 - Work at the Globe theatre in London
47 - Publish an article on theatre
46 - Be a guest speaker at an Ivy League University
45 - Attend the Tony Awards
44 - Climb Ensign Peak and wave a banner
43 - Read no fiction for one year (will probably start this 2010)
42 - Regular temple attendance - twice a month
41 - Watch someone getting a tattoo

Creepy Week Continues

Day 3 (Tuesday): Went with the traditional black-and-orange jewelry, and got into a great conversation about books with my "office"mate (heh). This reminded me that LM Montgomery (she of Anne of Green Gables fame) also had a bunch of short stories collected into volumes, one of which was themed for all things mystical and/or creepy. My favorite story is "The Tryst of the White Lady", about a boy who sees and is ensnared by the family ghost (a beautiful flirt murdered on her wedding day) and his subsequent return as he unexpectedly rescues a real, live girl. The collection's really only moderately creepy, but very atmospheric. Then watched Corpse Bride - it always surprises me just how beautiful that odd and freaky little show is... love the dead folk, love the art design, and the butterflies at the end always make me cry.

Day 4 (Wednesday): Strangely, this week already feels about 8 days long. Not sure why. The black nail polish is chipping rather horrifically, even after a patch job last night (this is one reason why I don't usually put polish on my fingernails). Must re-do before Saturday. Helped my amazingly awesome cousin by putting together a pretty cool (if I do say so myself) Prince Charming costume for her pretty awesome husband... one of the perks to working at a theatre is easy access to the costume stores! Made at least a little progress on my own costume, with help on my wig from a very talented employee (another perk: people who know and are VERY good at wigs). Oddly, not in the mood to watch anything - read a murder mystery instead ("Shakespeare and Smythe"! Very fun!) and called it thematic enough to count.

Guess What?

You don't have to be pretty.

Me either, for that matter.

I'm so relieved.

(I feel a T-shirt coming on.)

Halloween, Halloween, Halloween Time!

Day One of Halloween Week (Sunday): black nail polish, The Addams Family (movie). I'd forgotten how really funny, creepy, well-done, and all-around entertaining it is. I might have a little crush on Raul Julia at the moment.

Day Two (Monday): Sterling silver skull jewelry, black-and-orange-striped witchy socks, Buffy the Vampire Slayer (Season 2, Episode 6, "Halloween"). In this one, anyone who buys any part of a costume from the new shop in town gets caught in a spell that turns them into a real-life version of their outfit. Good if you're a soldier (presto real weapon!), bad if you're a ghost or an 18th-century lady. Giles the "tweed-clad" Watcher (a.k.a., "Ripper") pulls out some serious chops to whup the bad guy into next Easter and the day (and the Slayer), she is saved. Bonus: Willow accidentally catches Oz's eye (again - also, metaphorically).

A Quick Note

Just wanted to mention that I did, in fact, get video of the tent and quilts in action; and that after three attempts I have been completely unable to upload the video. Seriously, I left my computer processing the upload for over 8 hours before I finally gave up. So you're either going to have to take my word for the awesome that is the CUTENESS, or go see the show. (You can trust me, but really - go see it. Still a few weeks left!)

100 Life Goals (Part 2)

80 - Campaign for a cause
79 - Run for public office
78 - Do stand-up comedy (if you see a joke here relating to #79, you're not alone)
77 - Get on a TV show - a drama or sitcom
76 - Be married in the temple
75 - Earn/save one million dollars
74 - Find something good in someone I dislike
73 - Pay a compliment every day
72 - Kiss someone on every continent (except Antarctica)
71 - Visit Bora Bora
70 - Sing while flying in a hot-air balloon
69 - Go dancing in New York
68 - Be quoted in a newspaper
67 - Consult for a newsjournalism show
66 - Make something that is worn by someone famous
65 - Photograph a perfect moment
64 - Do a group hug with at least 200 people
63 - Participate in a flash mob
62 - Give away something expensive/valuable to someone in need
61 - Dance in a fountain


Note: Already, it has been interesting having these written down and noticing how often I think about them or find them occurring. No, I haven't yet planned a trip to Bora Bora, but I have to concede that writing things down really does make a difference. Right on, Sara!

The Drama Queen Sleeps Tonight

In which we shall see: "incendiary", "intrinsically", "foreseeable", dazzle, psychological trauma, "faceted", and underwater basket weaving. And Daylight Savings.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I feel like I should be getting something of substance posted here, a sociological rant or political commentary or something... maybe I should add that to my list of goals: "Post something substantial and/or incendiary at least once a week." Is there a good number that goes with that?

In the interests of going along with that whole "journal" concept, here's where I'm at - still looking for a job (or two - though in all honesty I haven't been looking very hard since I am intrinsically a lazy person and REALLY need to do something about that); still looking at new schools for a graduate program (I've requested an interview date for one school, and have three more possibilities to check out - so there's at least a little more progress than the job thing); I have given up ice cream for the foreseeable future, and have managed to stick to it for several weeks now; I really need to find a date for Halloween, since I have two tickets to "Thriller" and a great idea for a costume, if I ever get it finished; I conducted a Young Women's choir last week for a Stake Excellence night and am apparently pretty good at it, or at least, "interesting"; and I have finally managed to get most of my "office" de-junked. I still have to throw away the junk, but it has definitively been categorized as "junk". This, people, is my exciting life. Try not to be too dazzled.

Also, I auditioned today - I honestly figured I wouldn't be cast, because I am technically too old for the part for which I auditioned, but too young for the other two female characters in the show. I decided it would just be a good experience to audition, and keep "potential actor" a fresh aspect of myself for the producers. Well, I got called back after all - and not only did I get called back for the part for which I auditioned, I also got called back for at least one of the two older female parts for which I did not audition. See, the director of this play is the same one that directed a production in which I was cast as a sixty-year-old society matron, so unfortunately the production team knows I can play age well. (I say "unfortunately" because that first show ended up being quite psychologically traumatic, culminating when I attended a performance of the succeeding show and was not recognized by the usher, even though I had been single-cast and was in every performance. Once the usher realized the part I'd played, his surprised response was, "Oh! You're actually pretty!") Of course I will take whatever part I'm given, if I'm cast, and I will work hard at it and make it as faceted and interesting and funny as absolutely possible. It's just callbacks, after all, and anything can happen.

Obviously, I really need to get a life - possibly one that includes football, or ice-climbing, or yoga, or business-management classes. Maybe underwater basket weaving.



FYI: Since I only had two or so people respond to my potential giveaway, I think I'll be tabling it and holding out for a Thanksgiving or Christmas giveaway. That, and Halloween is in a week and see above re: lazy.

Also, just in case you were wondering, Daylight Savings happens on November 1st this year, a week from tomorrow. I know I was trying to figure out when it was going to happen! You're welcome.

Oh, AND: Flat Stanley came with me to the audition today, and he was a big hit. He's got a decent shot at at part, except that his traveling schedule REALLY conflicts with rehearsals and performances. Ah, well. He also got a backstage tour - though of the dressing rooms he only got to go in the boys'. Naturally.

100 Life Goals (Part 1)

In no particular order:

100 - Write a book
99 - Get a Master's degree
98 - Dramaturg a Broadway production
97 - Live in Italy for at least 6 months
96 - Live in Spain for at least 6 months
95 - Shave my head
94 - Grow my hair long
93 - Learn sign language
92 - Read all the Standard Works within a year
91 - Teach at a University
90 - Visit India
89 - Be in a Bollywood movie
88 - Attend a Nascar race
87 - Write a sonnet
86 - Memorize the Gettysburg address
85 - Have an article published in the Ensign
84 - Be cast in a show where my character is kissed onstage
83 - Get at least 12 dates a year
82 - Run a full marathon
81 - Starting in 2010, do two half-marathons a year

(to be continued...)

Fry It Up

Yesterday I participated in a conversation about things that can be deep-fat fried (and whether or not they should be). Twinkies, brownies, sandwiches, candy bars, turkeys... our consensus was, if the Lord had meant for it to be deep-fat fried, He would have put a stick in it (hello, corndog). (Also, the other exception - I'm not into fried chicken, but I suppose there are fans out there.)

Tonight I was hit with an unavoidable craving for cinnamon-sugar tortilla chips. I fried (using canola oil), I sugared, I shared - and tomorrow's breakfast is going to be yum-eeeee. If the midnight snack doesn't do away with my supply first!

There are only a few things I cook - but when it comes to sugar, I cook them well.

* This picture looks to me a little more like pie cookies than tortilla chips, but that's OK - I'm good at pie dough, too!

Distraction!

Now, this? Is Funny.



I would really like to find some random guy in a park somewhere and have this conversation with him. Just for FUN. Heh.

Autumn Falling

I like my hair.

I've been trying to find something to blog about (I seriously have been attempting to get that promised video of the teepee and the quilts posted - SO CUTE - and it has NOT uploaded. Grrr) and it's been pretty foggy. Not literally - I was out walking in the beeyoutiful fall sunshine today (sorry, all you rained-out West-coasters) and the fog was all mental. Here's what I realized: I really dislike "crushing" on someone because it makes me all emotional and out of control and stupid, but it's easier to feel alive and sparkly and mentally active if you've got some outside source of energy feeding you. I HATE feeling addicted to someone (so not EVER trying drugs or alcohol), and I really am bitter about the apparent truth that chemistry really can be one-sided. Or two-thirds-sided, if I'm being optimistic. So why is that? How can love/infatuation/attraction be such a complete downer and yet still be the thing that makes life interesting and exciting? There just HAS to be some other way.

In the meantime, at least, I really do like my hair.

Status

... is missing him and wanting to talk to him and listen to him and can't believe she's writing about this on a public blog ("private" journal). really. she's been weaning herself (as if there was a choice) from him for months - surely it's been too long to actually suffer withdrawals. they're just imaginary symptoms now, the disease has long since died out. the ice cream is going cold (see what she did there?) turkey, but his final ties should be easy to cut (snip, snip). there are no more one last chances. it doesn't take a crystal ball or overdressed psychic or potter-esque centaur (though she is partial to tea leaves, but not for reading. words are for reading, people are for... being people) to see the signs.

Stop. not Yield. do not Proceed With Caution. Stop.


* * * * *

... has a 90's-era German band pop song stuck in her head. it opened up her mind.

How to Blog a Back Pat

It's a tricky thing, to have a public blog and still feel like you can fully express yourself - especially when saying exactly what you feel might reveal you to be petty and selfish and/or has the potential to really tick somebody else off.

Sigh.

That doesn't mean I'm not going to try.

*clears throat*

It is possible (and possibly probable) that a particular student did exceptionally well in an annual drama competition held at my southern alma mater due to the participation of myself and a retired mentor/educator, in addition to the student's own preparation. It is possible that the probability is more likely than the possibility, due to current circumstances at the current student's current alma mater. Also, there is some likelihood that an associated team's unexpected (though very welcome) level of success was encouraged more by current student leadership, reflecting backward onto previous training situations, than by traditionally accepted forms of direction and normally upheld expectations.

Or, CONGRATULATIONS MADELINE AND BHS ENSEMBLE!!!






Confucius say: When in doubt, vague it up.
I say: When in doubt, make it up and blame Confucius.

Because I Have Nothing Else To Do (Ha): UPDATE

* I wish there were more of a need out here for people who create props for shows. I suppose that's something to look into...

* I love Glee. I'm finding it funny, and touching, and sooooo high school - more than anything, I just love the music. (And the singing/dancing. AWESOME.)

* I helped coach a former student on a monologue last night, and today I watched a Shakespeare Showcase that had me absolutely ITCHING to sit down with those kids, tear their pieces apart, and help them build them back up. I miss my high schoolers. I miss talented, dedicated, sweet, funny, stupid, wonderful teenagers. It's kind of a weird feeling. (I was attacked by several in the parking lot when I arrived, and then a whole bunch more when I got in the building, which was FANTASTIC.)

* I'm heading down to the Shakespeare Competition in Cedar tomorrow, for no real reason other than I needed a break, wanted to hang out with my friend, and decided to tag along.

* Phaidra and I REALLY need to write that book(s)/direct a show together/start that theater school ASAP. We'll get the book done before I go to grad school, she can have her second kid while I'm gone, and then we'll get cracking on that school when I get back. The show(s) will happen (again) eventually. She's the best, and we do make a good team.

* I should be packing. Gotta go check the laundry.

* I'm thinking about maybe creating a sandwich-board sign to wear during the weekend in Cedar, offering my services as director/coach/substitute drama teacher. Too desperate? No such thing these days? That's what I thought.

* Had a terrific conversation with a friend this week where I ended up being her sounding board and pitching all kinds of ideas for reality TV shows. Honestly, I think some of them could really work.

* I'm wondering: how does one go about becoming a stand-up comedian? Are there classes for that sort of thing? Do you just watch a bunch of other stand-up comics and then try to pick a different angle? Is it OK to make things up and then sell them as your own "experiences"?

* My back/hip has been out the last couple of days, and I've been spending time on a heating pad. It's been sooooo nice, and has been much easier than scrambling to get to the chiropractor. That heating pad is heading south with me for the weekend.

* I've reluctantly decided that ice cream is my Achilles' Heel, and the focus of the worst/most destructive co-dependent relationship I will ever have. And once I go get another bowl of the Schwann's Chocolate Chip that's sitting upstairs in the freezer (you don't even KNOW), I will swear off of the devil's ambrosia for good. (Or until I've earned a treat. Although it will NOT live in my freezer ever again - Cold Stone, you might need to take out the restraining order against me NOW. Please.)

* I really do (heart) irony.


ETA: I'm kind of thinking I want to do a give-away - it's what all the cool bloggers are up to these days! I don't have sponsors or anything, so I'd have to offer jewelry (or random theatre props, or maybe bizarre poetry, or video of myself lip-synching to a Glee song...) that I'd make... Fortuately, it's October, and I have some really fun Halloween-y sterling silver beads and charms. Is that something any of you would be interested in?

The Cuteness

HAPPY OCTOBER! I AM VERY EXCITED TO WEAR HALLOWEEN JEWELRY AND PUT UP HALLOWEEN DECORATIONS! IN AND OFF ITSELF, THIS IS NOT CAPSLOCK-WORTHY, BUT THE CAPSLOCK IS MANDATORY IN CONNECTION WITH THIS:


FINISHED! IT IS. THE. CUTENESS. EVERYONE AGREES.

ALSO, TEAR-AWAY-ABLE, AS PROMISED.


I WILL DO WHAT I CAN TO GET VIDEO OF THE SCENE IN WHICH IT APPEARS - BECAUSE WHEN PARTNERED WITH THE SILK-AND-TAFFETA QUILTS I ALSO MADE, WE ARE SURPASSING "PUPPIES AND BABY SEALS" IN CUTEABILITY. SERIOUSLY.



BE READY.

Overheard At Work

"Really, I think that cat should be able to reproduce if it wants to!"

Is there a survey for that?

. . .

Context. Oy, context.

* * * * *

Speaking of Facebook (what? I wasn't? Please, just tell me that when you read the above you didn't immediately expect that it would show up as a status update somewhere), I finally reach my limit and "un"friend a guy who has fairly definitively demonstrated his LACK of interest in me (plus I'm sick of seeing his updates and "pining", urgh) - and the very next day he texts me and starts getting chatty. Is it my bad timing striking again, or is this just guy-typical?!? I give up.

You Are What You Think You Are

I need to be reminded of this. Like, every five minutes or so.


I wonder if we can do something about it - you know how they say men think about sex every seven minutes or thirty seconds or whatever... Maybe we women could train ourselves so that every time we see a man (or a woman, or a dog, or an ad of some kind, etc...) we automatically think: "You know, I really look pretty good today. The End." or "I've got a terrific smile. I'll try it out on him/her/the dog." or "Perfect is overrated. I'm doing just fine with FABULOUS." Just imagine all the positive reinforcement we'd be getting all day long... and think about what it would be like if we knew most/all of the women we were interacting with all day long were also getting that positive reinforcement.

Seriously. Go read that column again. And then comment with your suggestions here!

My Timing is Broken

Also, I have discovered a heretofore unrealized (though previously hinted at) ability to really tick people off. It may have something to do with the title of this post.

And: Current work project - The TeePee.

These are two of the side panels for the tear-away teepee - with my brushes and perfectionistic intensity I'm like the most artistically determined kindergartener EVER. I seriously get all Rembrandt-y with my color saturation and precise lines and layering and such, and then I step back and go, "Right. It's a CARTOON."

Still the greatest job. I know. Finding a home has been tricky, though - I've now been kicked out of two spaces and am currently doing finishing details (with glitter glue and sequins, natch) on 8-foot panels in the props closet. *Sigh* Well, there had to be SOME downside, right?

(And at least I'll now be here to see the tear-away teepee in action in the show...)

* * * * *

It's almost 7 in the morning in the UK. A week and a half ago I was planning to be waking up there right about... now. One year to go.

The News RE: Me

I'm sick. Darn these end-of-summer colds, anyway!

I auditioned and got a callback for a Christmas show, even with the above nasal and bronchial (???) problems. Score!

I can see some of you now, going "Huh? Christmas show? In the UK?"

I'm not going to grad school this fall. Yes, the plane leaves Wednesday. No, I won't be on it.




(a pause to absorb)

Now, this isn't bad news, it's not good news, it's just news (well, maybe it's good-and-bad news, or "disappointing-with-a-postive-side" news... ANYWAY) so no need to panic or get overly excited. (No engagement or death in the family or anything like that.) It's a weird feeling, knowing I'm not going now - but I'm OK. Here's what happened: It was a fairly bumpy process just getting into the grad school - I started really late, and didn't know anything about how to go about it. I had a wonderful cousin who did a lot of legwork for me (or I wouldn't have gotten accepted at all, I'm sure) but the Student Visa process was a confusing headache, the finances required all kinds of juggling, and I wasn't able to get on-campus housing (or any private housing, even with help from the local - UK - bishop).

This past week I got two emails from the school - one from Admin, saying, "You don't have a visa (although that did show up the next day), you don't have housing, are you sure you're coming? Please defer until next year." The other was from the Drama Department with an agenda concerning the pre-session seminars they hold for the post-grads that included course descriptions, and as I read them over I realized they had nothing to do with anything I was interested in. I called the school and found out I had been accepted into the wrong program. (Yes, I felt like a major idiot for figuring that out so late, and the lady I was talking to, though still very polite, confirmed that impression.) I emailed the program (or, "programme") director and he described for me the Drama Research program, which is the one I'd originally applied for. He agreed to let me switch programs - and mentioned that if I did, I'd be the only student in the program. Oy. And even then, Drama Research is still not specifically the work I want to be doing in theater.

So - I decided that what I should do is to take the next year and A) get into the program I really want, the Dramaturgy Masters Degree, B) get other people to pay for this degree, since I now know where to apply for grants and scholarships (it was way too late to apply for any of them this year), and C) find housing much further in advance than say, three weeks before I arrive. I plan to work like crazy this year to build up savings, hit up local theatres to work on shows to build up experience, and do fun new things with friends and good things for other people to keep me from getting discouraged or bored.*

Thanks so much to everyone who has been so supportive and excited for me! It's still going to happen - there'll just be a detour first!

* For example, some friends and I went to the British Tea Shoppe in Salt Lake for a going-away party that turned into a Happy "Talk Like a Pirate Day" Party but was really just an excuse to hang out, and it was delicious. Then we strolled around the neighborhood for a while and checked out houses, explored this funky little sculpture park, and ended up eating some really fantastic Thai food. See? Fun! New! Totally not boring!

Randomosity

Today at work I made a prototype Tear-Away Teepee. (Not kidding.) There's a porno joke in there somewhere, but I wouldn't have the slightest idea where to even begin looking.

... [And] I'm sticking to it.

* * * * *

Pop Culture Relevance Counter: 1

- Last night I was watching a recent episode of NCIS, and one of the characters referenced the story of Aeschylus (he pronounced it "Ay-skee-lus") with the bird (in this telling a vulture) dropping a rock on the unsuspecting man's head... followed immediately by another character finishing up with, "The Father of Greek Tragedy". I felt so hip.

* * * * *

The good news is: I'm not the only international post-grad student still looking for someplace to live for the upcoming school year. I feel less stupid, more validated as a person and part of a larger group.

The bad news is: I'm not the only international post-grad student still looking for someplace to live for the upcoming school year. Options are getting reeeeally slim, and I sorta wish I were there already to claw the others out of the way. Every student for himself/herself!

In two weeks I will have been in England for a few hours, and hopefully will be unpacking a few things someplace cozy and liveable. (Let us pray.)

* * * * *

I found another North and South fan today. They're everywhere. (Also, it's entirely possible that, thanks to yet another member of the N&S rabid fan base, I might have found a version of the completely unavailable soundtrack. *whistles nonchalantly*)

* * * * *

There will be no political commentary in today's post. Unless you add it in the comments, of course - but that's up to you. No pressure.

The "New" American President

By now, we all know that President Obama did not, in fact, attempt to "indoctrinate" 3rd-graders, unless by "indoctrinate" we mean "encourage to work hard, stay in school, take responsibility, and make something of themselves (paraphrased)", which we don't. No one can honestly take much exception to the speech itself... and yet the debate continues.

This morning I was reading an online newspaper article about the speech and which schools showed it, kids and parents that opted out, etc... I was browsing through the user comments when I came across one that really surprised me. I quote:

"I'm offended that people tell me I should make my kids listen to Obama and then deprogram them later. I don't make them watch pornography to teach them purity, and I don't make them smoke to teach them about the word of wisdom. Greatfully, my kids were in the Nebo school district where they didn't have to watch. And I don't need to watch it either to know it's ill effects. There are plenty of people on the media who have dissected it for me so that I know that it was simply a media ploy to get to our children."

There were ridiculous comments from people complaining about what the President SHOULD have said, comments about the health care program, issues with BUSH, all kinds of crap - this one jumped out at me as one particular pinnacle of irony. I'm fairly certain that one of the President's points was taking personal responsibility, right? This parent is raising his/her children by way of the MEDIA, instead of doing it himself/herself. Excuse me, but WTH? I'm not sure I see the parallel between listening to a brief speech for school-age children with pornography and smoking. It sounds to me like this is one of those people who expect everyone else to raise his (whatever - call it generic) children. It's like assuming that one can blithely send the kids off to school each day knowing that they'll be perfectly safe while the parent goes about their business, and that there is no real need to discuss or explain (er, "deprogram") much of anything at all with said kids. How can any parent possibly assume that children are "safe", that the local neighborhood is no kind of place that requires deprogramming?

I have a sister who lives on a blueberry farm in a rural area in the Northwest. Her young children come home from school with all kinds of questions about things they heard from their friends, topics that I wasn't even aware existed until high school or even college. Fortunately, this parent has created an atmosphere in which children feel welcome to question and discuss, and they understand that if they hear anything that makes them curious or uncomfortable they are free to talk to their parents first - and that they will recieve a non-condescending answer appropriate to their level of understanding (which, if I may remind all of us, is much more developed than it was in my day. Get off my lawn, whippersnappers!). Another family I know has children so repressed and sheltered that they don't even know what questions to ASK, let alone how to discuss current topics.

I taught high school for a few months recently, and I saw that the lack of parental responsibility was rampant - translating into a lack of student responsibility. Parents, stop giving your kids what you think they want, and start giving them what they need!

OK, sorry, something of a tangent. I see that the main problem buried in the furor over the President's School speech is not his message, or even really his potential message, it is the fact that we, as a collective people, no longer trust the office of the President of the United States. It's a loss that has been eroding for quite some time now, with major motivating force powered by Nixon and getting a healthy boost from Clinton (yes, Reagan wasn't perfect, and yes, issues have been had by many with both Bush Sr. and Bush Jr.), and culminating with a current President who started off with extraordinarily high expectations and falling rapidly through major economic difficulties and public perception problems. Guess what? It's not Obama's fault. He needs to take responsibility and make changes, YES, but...

... SO DO WE.

In a way, I'm pleased that so many people have gotten so up-in-arms about this relatively small issue of the President's School speech - maybe now they'll pay attention to the larger issues at hand, educate themselves (by reading and listening to more than just one talk-show host or talk-radio station), encourage and expect the President and our other elected officials to take responsibility for their actions, and translate that behavior into taking responsibility for themselves and their children. As American citizens, it's the least we can do.

Really.




* * * * *

In a not-really-related-but-sorta sidenote, I watched the season finale of "10 Things I Hate About You" on ABC Family (the TV series, not the movie - don't be "judgy") and the main character, Kat, led a school protest of uniforms and civil rights violations. Eventually, the protest ended with her father coming to her: "suspension", "college", "stop it and go to class." She didn't like it, but she did decide to concede for the "big picture" and because her father told her to. The thing I thought was interesting was that as she explained to the last two protesters that she was calling off the fight she didn't tell them her dad made her stop (which was the truth). She took responsibility for leading the protest and she took responsibility for calling it off. (Later, she also took responsibility for sticking with her principles anyway, but that's a different point.) Taking responsibility... what a concept.

Ethan Peck, grandson of Gregory Peck - "Patrick" from 10 Things. Yeah. Good show. It's entirely possible I would vote for EP if HE ran for President... I'd listen to his State of the Union Address like it was a Top 40 radio hit. Seriously. Just LISTEN to his voice!

Ahem.

Sarcasm Font Needed

These are both random AND completely awesome.

Thank you, Facebook friends, for giving me something to link from my blog once more!

Modern Methods of Communication

1. Facebook chat.
2. Facebook Wall post.
3. Facebook message (i.e., Facebook email)
4. Actual email
5. My blog (both email and blog addresses are on my Facebook profile)
6. Text
7. Phone call
8. Online phone book (for street address in order to visit)
9. Actual phone book (how many people with my last name do you REALLY think live in your zip code, anyway?)
10. Mutual friend number one - to pass message, give address, etc...
11. Mutual friends 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7... up to 15 or so that actually have my phone number and would be happy to emulate #10
12. Billboard (farfetched, I know, but do-able)
13. Random encounter
14. (Insert additonal methods here...)

Effective options: 1 - 11
Options "tried": 1, 7
Option that "succeeded": 13

Your response: "I couldn't get a hold of you" "I really tried" "You didn't respond on Facebook that one time when we were chatting, or something" "I'm sure I called and left messages"

"I missed you" "I really wanted to spend time with you, I did"

...

My response: "BITE ME."




P.S. If you say you're going to call, call. Don't be an ass. Also, listen to me - if I say I'm going to do something (like call you) and you agree, I'm going to do it. Don't jerk me around once I do. Of course, this is all rhetorical "save a little trouble for the next girl" (thank you, Carrie) advice... See above, RE: "My response".

Vegging

I want a Twinkie so badly right now I'd probably try to eat the desk if it had a picture of one pasted to it. I will not put up a photo of one on this blog, for fear I would try to eat the computer.

I just realized how incredibly spoiled I am (we are) -I've been eating only raw fruits and vegetables for two days now (evidently this is good for the colon) and while generally it hasn't been too bad, there are moments (like right now and the past half hour) where I have been craving ANYTHING and EVERYTHING else. I had to put a book down because the characters were in a restaurant and started talking about food. I'd probably go ballistic in a theater if I were watching Julie and Julia. I am SO BORED with fruits and vegetables!!!! (This is the spoiled part.) How is that possible? I've eaten at least nine different kinds of fruit today, and seven different veggies. I enjoyed them all. It's only for three days, and I am not only aware of this but consciously decided (eight veggies! I thought of another one!) to try this out. And yet I would quite possibly gouge someone else's eye out for their fatty/sugary baked goods. (Note to self: MUST go to bakery on Saturday).

What's next? A bean and rice diet, just to teach me some perspective and gratitude? (Er, maybe not - that would require even more Gas-X than I'm currently using.)

On the plus side, I've dropped at least two pounds in the first two days, and I've been stuffing myself. Time for a cup of herbal (peppermint is a natural appetite suppressant, did you know?) tea and off to bed... most likely to dream of Twinkies.

Week In Review

26 hours driving a mini-van by oneself sounds like:

- Daughtry - Leave This Town
- Notre Dame de Paris (Euro Musical Cast)
- The Scarlet Pimpernel (Original Cast)
- Hairspray (Movie Soundtrack)
- Emerson Drive - What If?
- Brian Regan LIVE
- "All Star Christmas" Mix
- Aly & AJ - Into the Rush
- Kelly Clarkson - All I Ever Wanted
- Teen Witch: The Musical (Original Cast)
- Sky High (Movie Soundtrack)
- Dragonsong by Anne McCaffery (I am SO glad I figured out how to load that onto my Ipod Shuffle!)

* * * * *

Achievement Day for 9 - 11 yr. old girls. "Vinyl lettering on tile" is evidently the new tole painting. Pink vinyl is the worst, FYI.

* * * * *

It was a really great tent, made even greater by the fact that it came equipped with a basic queen-sized mattress for the visiting oldster, yours truly. Loved the star-gazing-friendly mesh window, having the sprinklers turned off and the train decide not to drive by in the middle of the night. This tent was not so great in the heating department. In the tent's defense, it wasn't SUPPOSED to get that cold that night...

PRO: Nobody wet their sleeping bag.
CON: The train did visit after all, at 6 AM. No walls to mute the rattle.

* * * * *

Why do I always start to feel sick when I visit Oregon? I'm not allergic to anything, I usually get in at least one day of exercise... Is it the sea level? Delayed travel lag? Crappy guest-room mattress? (Sorry, K. At least the food is always good!) Speaking of...

No one is ever to sick for:

Seriously. Could eat there every day. My sister actually has (well, three days in a row, anyhow).

Also, made the kids watch Hairspray this afternoon. They liked it, but my oldest nephew thought it was "weird".

* * * * *

In theory, I'm a fan of weddings. In practice, I'd just as soon not be there - thanks in large part to the tendency of elderly family members to do things like grabbing my left hand and loudly asking, "Aren't you married yet?!?", always in public settings and usually during a lull in other conversation. My cousin's wedding on Thursday was very nice - got held up for about 45 minutes since another cousin hadn't realized her temple recommend had expired and the temple workers were scrambling to find enough people to vouch for her and get her in. She was cleared, but had hied off to parts unknown. Her bishop speculated: "She's probably in a bar." Generally speaking, you don't often laugh that hard in a temple sealing room.

* * * * *

An excellent new series:


Silent in the Grave, Silent in the Sanctuary, and Silent on the Moor - all excellent Victorian-era mysteries with just a dash of romance thrown in. And I'm serious about that "dash" - ignore the covers, because these book are not in any way the Harlequin-esque "bodice rippers" they would appear to be. (Pity, that.) (Sort of kidding, there.)

* * * * *

As a rule, I don't like wedding receptions. I've been to a LOT of them, and at least half the time end up working in some capacity or other - cutting and serving cake, arranging decorations, cleaning up, etc... Also, I have an embarrasingly large collection of bouquets that I've caught in the bridal toss, in spite of my long-standing policy to hide in a closet during that activity. I was fully prepared to not like this reception either - I was working hard to get tables set and decorations up and fluffed, and had been asked to sit at the guest book and welcome people once things started. Bleh.

Even my reception gloom could not withstand the nuptial glow, however - my cousin and his new wife were so brilliantly happy you couldn't help but feel good when you were around them. She's absolutely darling, and the two of them are a wonderful match. The food was good, the people sitting at our table were friendly and funny, and the cheesecake production line I helped to organize was a work of art and marvel of efficiency. (My sister is REALLY good at that kind of thing. We were awesome.) Also, my parents got into a fight in the garage over the proper way to serve the dinner buffet, and my sister's retelling of the story is hilarious. We were able to duck out early on the excuse that I had to start a 13-hour drive at 5 AM the next day, so I missed the bouquet toss altogether. Score!

* * * * *

I managed to squeeze in a visit to one of my favorite places, Silver Falls State Park. I know. A place that highlights hiking is one that I love most. What can I say - I'm complex!


* * * * *

Thank goodness a former fellow employee put me onto her "iguana" or Guarana pills - the "natural stimulant" may in fact be cartloads of caffeine, but they got me and four coolers full of Oregon blueberries and raspberries home safely after 13 extremely boring hours on the road. I really don't remember anymore why I volunteered for that part. Complex... or just an idiot?

Don't answer that.

* * * * *

The dedication today was lovely.

I've got a lot to do if I want to visit all the temples in the area before I leave for England (which I do).

I've got even more to do if I want to leave for England!

Arrested Development Revisited (The Condition, Not the TV Show)

Interesting.

I didn't plan to see the movie, and that plan hasn't changed - and I'm more interested now in asking the same question the reviewer does. Retro is for fashion and design influences, not gender attitudes and perceptions. I can think of a few favorite books where the heroine becomes the person she wants to be AND gets the guy, and doesn't do what she does in order to get the guy. I can think of a lot of movies where the girl gives up everything to get the guy - are there any out there that illustrate the point the reviewer is talking about? In Legally Blonde, the fact that Elle ends up dating Emmett is something of an afterthought - she doesn't sacrifice for him, or compromise her goals or change her vision of who she can be in order to be with him.

Illustrate, discuss - is there hope for Hollywood and the Happily Ever After?

Gettin' Schooled

I would just like to take a moment to mention here that IT IS NOT EASY TO GET A STUDENT VISA TO THE UK. URGH. There is probably some website out there that walks you through every step and includes a timeline of exactly when you should be jumping through which hoop, much like really organized wedding planning - and if there isn't, there should be. Granted, me getting into grad school in England is on a much closer par to, well, not a Vegas hitching, but at least a last-minute elopement with delusions of the full three-ring circus extravaganza.

Evidently, I have to present a letter I can only receive after paying a deposit and sending in a notarized transcript of an interview with the local police department, along with that original affirmation of good conduct, yet another school transcript, evidence that the full price of a couple of VERY nice cars has been living in my bank account for at least a month; and then only when I've made an appointment to present that letter/plus application/plus full physical and "biometrics" during the full moon and following a ritual rain dance. The problem? I still haven't gotten that letter. I did what I was supposed to to get it (I didn't know a body cavity search would be part of that "good conduct" interview) and the letter I got I thought was right turned out to be the opposite of. (Insert own dating joke here.)

On the plus side, the rain dance seemed to be a success.

5 for 5

It's movie review time again, people! I averaged out at just under a movie a day this week, so obviously, it's time to talk about them.

Let me start off by saying: this was a very good week for movies.

* * * * *

1 - One of my favorite classes to teach while I was subbing a few months back was Drama II. The kids were terrific, and we really had a good time. There were also lots of class inside jokes: one, in particular, presumed that a certain girl had a huge crush on Zac Efron when, in fact, she couldn't stand him. She was a great sport about it and it kept coming up, even to the point of becoming a plot (and set) piece in their group movie. Anyway, one day in the midst of some usual ribbing, one of the boys in class spoke up. This kid is the poster child for emo-rock, and definitely more inclined towards horror, psychedelic "drama", and gross-out humor than anything Disney-related. Imagine our collective shock then, when he calmly (and more than a touch defiantly) proclaimed that not only had he been to see "17 Again" (starring Zac Efron) but he really really liked it, AND intended to see it again, AND he didn't care what anyone else thought. Shock and awe all around.

And even this event was not enough to get me into a theater to see the movie...

... which I can now see is somewhat unfortunate, since I saw the movie for the first time on Monday, and thoroughly enjoyed it. A couple of friends came over, and we laughed ourselves silly over it, in the best possible way. There was the occasional startled sideways glance, followed by a whispered, "who would have though ZAC EFRON could ACT?!?" and then back to the action. One girl's part is not as fleshed-out or motivated as I would have liked, but Efron really was excellent (and funny! Comic timing wow!) and Matthew Perry was even more endearing than I remembered. As my friend put it, the movie also has one of the best/most hilarious secondary couples EVER. I have no qualms about seeing this one again. Thanks, DVD! (And Tara, for bringing it over! And Greg, for being there! Here's to the sweater!)

2 - Wednesday I did some cleanup at the theater (yay to the show being open, though!) and then took myself to a matinee of "G.I. Joe: Rise of the Cobra". Now, look - I am a child of the eighties. I may be a girl, but G.I. Joe was one of my favorite shows - heck, we even used it as the theme for one of my EFY groups just a couple of years ago (we were the "G.I. Josephats" - the other counselor and I even pulled out cammo pants, hats, and makeup. We were INTENSE). It's not like I was ever NOT going to see this movie. Plus, I've always had a soft spot for Channing Tatum (A friend: "I can't stand him. Also, he has two girl names!") and I was delighted to discover (because I am weird) that Joseph Gordon-Levitt had a part as a *SPOILER* villian. (See review below, and mentions in previous posts *ahem*.) I knew the reviews hadn't been great, so my expectations were fairly low. I read another review that talked about long stretches of boredom.

Silly reviewer people, silly ADD article author... the movie was just fine. Yes, it was fluff and action. Yes, there's not much going on besides pretty people blowing things up and being special-effected and saving the world and stuff. What else did they expect? In fact, there was also some attempt at character development and an actual plot, there was relatively decent script work, there were some great design concepts, and there was Dennis Quaid playing a tough-as-nails hands-on General. All bonuses, as far as I was concerned. I liked it MUCH more than Transformers 2, to which it is being regularly compared. No, it won't be winning any acting/directing/philosophy awards any time soon, but it was fun and the occasional references to the cartoon sprinkled through the show kept me very happy. You can't always trust reviewers, after all - you have to know for yourself, because (*wait for it* *sorry, I just HAVE to*) Knowing Is Half The Battle.

In all honesty, that line really is as cheesy as ever, even when Dennis Quaid is the one saying it.

3 - Thursday it was time for the completely delightful "Julie & Julia". I feel very comfortable saying that if you like Meryl Streep, and/or Amy Adams, and /or food, you'll like (quite possibly love) this movie. Wonderful performances all around, fantastic cinematography (Paris! All the food!) - it's charming, touching, and funny. There are all sorts of metaphors one could make here about the "recipe for a winning film" or this being the way to "serve up a tasty bite of life" or some other such type of drivel (sorry to all the official reviewers out there who have already taken this cliched road!) but I won't. I'll just stick with: I liked it, it was calorie-free, and did not make me want to learn to cook French food. For as good as the movie was, that last is a relief.

4 - Friday got busy, so today I took myself out for a double-feature. Okay, remember the preface (above) to "17 Again"? My response to Vanessa Hudgens is quite similar to the class's reactions to Zac Efron. NOT a fan. And yet... I completely loved "BandSlam". I'm not kidding. It was hilarious, and edgy, with some really excellent music, and VH doing this completely weird near-goth-emo-vocally-impaired chick that very much surprised me. It's not a Disney-fied movie, it's really not. Yes, there are a couple of Disney stars in it. Yes, it has a Disney moment or two - but not where you'd expect, and there are a few other plot points and twists that haven't ever seen the light of a Disney day before. And the set-up! "Strange, odd loner-kid gets hooked up (not "hooks up") with two very different, also odd (for various reasons) pretty girls and very interesting sorts of character things start to happen!" It's FUN. It's also high school, so it's painful. But it's FUN! I'm really hoping to go again with friends, because this time I want to laugh about it with people that I know... I liked it that much.

5 - And then I moved to another auditorium at the same movie theatre for part 2 of today's outing (which also happened to be the second time I saw this last movie, so I'm cheating here a little)... "(500) Days of Summer". Still brilliant. Still starmaking, for Joseph Gordon-Levitt at least, though Zooey Deschanel was perfectly cast IMO and will probably help start a new retro fashion trend. It's absolutely a fascinating piece of work in itself - it's non-linear, so it doesn't follow the story straight through. (Incidentally, it reminds me a little of the book The Time-Traveler's Wife, which is amazing, even though the reviews for that movie adaptation have not been very good. If this team had done T-TW, I think it could have been wonderful.) It jumps around to different days in the relationship of the boy and girl, and keeps the audience on track with a counter that starts off each scene. That way, the audience sees things that they think they understand, but come to realize later actually meant something completely different than what they thought. And if that isn't a perfect visualization right there of the complexities of boy/girl relationships, I don't know what is. You're told right off that the movie is not a love story. It's not. It is a story about love, and life, and figuring out who you are and what you want. It doesn't have the ending we've been programmed to expect, but the one it's got is even more satisfying. Also, JG-L is beyond adorable... I may have mentioned that before.

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I say with some confidence that I am not likely to cram this many movies into one week again, not unless I'm getting paid to do it (and I'd like to mention to the Universe that I certainly wouldn't mind getting paid to do it!). There is, after all, a life of some kind trying to go on over here too! More on that later!

Meanwhile, Back At The Ranch...

FINALLY. The show is open. I tried a while ago to put up a "Pony Painting in Progress Post", but the blog REALLY did not like all the pictures. Here, I have simplified.


First up, we start in pony rehab. The five carousel horses were all different colors, and this poor guy actually had a broken leg. Instead of putting him down, though, we brought out the "theater magic"...



Do not adjust your screen - this is the angle Rehab Patient Number 2 was hoisted to in order to repair some cracks and holes. These ponies have really been through it! (Also, they all got a base coat of white spray paint.)

While rehab was going on, we got to work on the "healthy" crew - color, gold paint galore...

... then glitter, rhinestones, jewels, and even more gold. These are Pretty Ponies! (Very popular, too. Everyone wanted to visit, and one employee wants to keep one in his office when the show is over.)

They currently make their home onstage, in the pretty-close-to-full-size carousel (it's one heck of an opening number) - the Carousel is now decked out with mirrors, flowers, drapery, more flowers, and actors dressed as French (fully clothed - and wigged) Cupids. The bows and arrows are a whole 'nother story.

This entire process actually started with four miniature horses that are now the pre-show set on stage, and under which the stage lifts to reveal the Carousel - TODAY, the boss decides that the "baby ponies" also need a carousel. This is what was finished five minutes before the house opened.

Damn, we're good.

Bonus: The Super-Sekrit Scarlet Pimpernel Escape Plan, currently living on the wall of the Hideaway! (When I say I am ALL OVER this set, I am very much not kidding.)

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People. Tonight I found out Zac Efron can act. Guh.